Ask A Wellness Expert

Question: I’m pretty good about staying active and watching what I eat, but have several family members who are couch-potatoes (or desk potatoes) and I worry about them. Some already have health problems that are probably at least exacerbated by inactivity and junk food. I’ve tried to invite them on walks, bike, rides, and trips to the gym, to no avail. How do I inspire my loved ones to exercise and eat well without coming off as overbearing or self-righteous? Am I being overbearing or self-righteous?

You are not being overbearing or self-righteous, rather, you are a concerned family member. Unfortunately, only you can control your actions. You cannot control anyone else or their actions. The very important piece that makes exercise work for people is motivation. Motivation is individual and intrinsic, and not something that people can bestow on others. Remember those times when someone tells you what you “should” do because they think it is best for you? It often does not resonate well because deep down, only you know what is best for you.

Even in this case, you may know that exercise and eating less junk food is good for your family, but still, they are in charge of themselves. You could try sharing your concerns with them, then collect their thoughts by asking “what do you think about that?” Being honest might just open up a door to playing a game of basketball after dinner or doing some relay races in the backyard on the weekends. You never know what might spark change, and telling them how you feel is a great place to start.